I am....

For too long I've been using I am... I woke up this morning with all the I am's.... circling in my mind.

I am too ashamed.
I am too embarrassed.
I am too scared.
I am too fat.
I am too ugly.

I AM full of excuses!!! These are all things I told myself or others in order to not put myself out there. I've hid behind all of these for far too long. As I ran my second 5k yesterday, and celebrated the would have been 6th birthday of Ilee; I realized something... I am no longer holding myself back. I have come so far, and been through so much...

I am determined.
I am motivated.
I am a different person.
I am strong.
I am brave.
I am healthy.
I am beautiful on the inside.

These are the things that matter to me. One day very soon I will be adding, I am confident in who I am! Not there yet, but I'm definitely cruising right along. I never dreamed of being a runner; not that I'd say I'm a runner yet, but I shaved 11 minutes off my first 5ks time yesterday. That's a huge accomplishment that I'm very proud of. I never thought I could live again without Ilee, and here I am still celebrating her life several years later.

I am getting there! I hope you all have a wonderful Mother's Day!

Week almost 12 (tomorrow)

Down 40.4 lbs  weight  219.6